Adventures in Dating: The one where I throw up a little in my mouth.

Note: All posts are verbatim. I have changed nothing, including grammar and punctuation (or lack thereof), except their screen name in order to protect the stupid. 

Yep...this just happened.

Master MAXIMUS: your neck, eh ? I have a certain bauble for your neck !

now, for the important stuff - - - are you really, I mean, really, really, really ready for a dominant Master in your life ? this is way beyond the pale of "kinky" play - this is for real - and not to be entered into like a high school seduction "going steady" type of relationship. 

now is the time to run and hide - later it will be too late. 

so, again, are you ready to explore your inner nature with a dominant Master ?

take care, MAX

I responded with "Eww,..I mean ehh, no thanks." Not sure what else it warrants saying.

--
OOOOOH UPDATE!!!

Just realised my message to him never actually went through and so I took the opportunity to write this.


"Hi, not sure what in my profile indicated that I'd welcome such a message, but I don't and I'd thank you to not send a message like that to me or any other woman out there without knowing if she'd welcome it first." 

(I'm sure I could have gone meaner or colder, but hopefully this will have the same effect.)

Adventures in Dating: The one where I let it go on for far too long.

Note: All posts are verbatim. I have changed nothing, including grammar and punctuation (or lack thereof), except their screen name in order to protect the stupid.

A guy with the screen name OKC s/n USM@rineVA/ Skype s/n mandib@ins sent me a message on the website and after chatting with him for a bit he asked for my Skype name because he said that Quantico will block the chat. Normally I wouldn't give that out, but Skype is one of those places where you can block someone almost immediately and report them for abuse if they start to get stupid. Which is what I ended up doing. Read on for more details. (My notes are in yellow about how this conversation went so badly.)

mandib@ins: wow DND .. hv a good night

mandib@ins: u went to DND lol do u hv many admires on skype or what ;) (Should have known. Also, by the shirtless picture. Ugh, never talk to those guys. They are the worst!)

Me: What is DND?

mandib@ins: Dont not Disturb

Me: I did it because most people I chat with are on the other side of the world so I do it just in case.*

mandib@ins: i bet u r ass is on bed nnow. Wht do u do for work? (Should have known.)

mandib@ins: wow u r geo spatial chic ;)

Me:  Yeah, I guess I am

Me: I’m an executive assistant at an education non-profit

mandib@ins: hot seceretary :) (Yep, should have known.)

Me: And I am in bed. My medication is kicking in. Been very sick lately

mandib@ins: u like office admin

mandib@ins: aww wht happened love? (This is what immediately turns me off. I even put it in my OKC profile that we shouldn't pretend that we know each other and this is specifically what I was referring to. Rhetorical question, but don't people think about things before they write them???)

Me: Love?

mandib@ins: NVM

Me:  No offense but we don't know each other

mandib@ins: what is u r major in school?

mandib@ins: ok may be u r conservative side is kciking in

mandib@ins: i ll take lov back

Me: It's not conservative

Me:  Just common sense I think

Me: Anyway I've gotta go

Me:  You have a wonderful night

mandib@ins: good luck

mandib@ins: u r too judgemental n actually i guess u r like 35 or so (This is where he lashes out because he just felt rejected. Also, I think it's hilarious and sad that 35 is old to him. He's only 27!)

mandibains: jus pretendin to be young

mandibains: bye

Me: Actually I'm 50 (This is where I prove I'm funny.)

Me: Good guess

Me: And judging by your atrocious grammar, you're how old...? (This is also where I prove I'm pretty immature as well.)

Me: Goodbye

mandib@ins: hahaha

mandib@ins: Good bye asian lady

Me: See ya white boy

*This statement didn't copy and paste so for transparency's sake I want to say that it's not verbatim. After I blocked him the conversation disappeared, but didn't C/P into Word very well.

Adventures in Dating: Why?

I get a lot of people asking me why I'm doing online dating. "Why, why, why?" I'm now sure how to answer this because I feel like they secretly mean, "what's wrong with you that you can't meet a man in real life?" There's nothing fundamentally wrong with me. I know there are quirks, there always are, but to think that something's wrong is...well...is just plain wrong. I do have quite a number of friends that are supportive and might I say, enthusiastic, about my venture into the world of online dating and let me tell you, it's a world of it's own alright. It's a world where you have to be really good at sales because the product you're selling is yourself. It's a world where you're apparently allowed to be as rude, lewd or ill-tempered as you'd like because there's no one to hold you accountable for your words. It's a world where the purpose is to put yourself out there and hopefully experience something amazing, but instead you're often left feeling put off by your fellow man, nay human being. I feel like I've just listed a lot of negatives when in fact I've actually had some positives, but in the end I haven't met anyone I could envision a long term relationship (romantic or otherwise) with so I chalk that up to the negative column. Continue to read for more "Oh. My. God." moments.